Where is the wild?

February 2026

Where is the wild?
Where do the fiery dreams hide?

I pass through a portal with my uterus
it crackles constantly and softly, an acceptable pain, almost comforting.
I left behind a space of life that seems unreal to me.
in a present that looks to the future with too much expectation.

Pasts fighting with futures, lives between lives
and I ask myself: Where is mine?
Was this what I wanted?
Will I ever find satisfaction?

Probably not, if what I seek is to please others
it's just that thinking about what I want seems brutal, selfish, almost desolate
I choose not to think about it, and I know that is one of the worst decisions I've made in my life.

In the end, we see those good decisions over the years,
and often, because of everything we lost in them, we're afraid to make others
even knowing that it's the price to pay,
however, I keep choosing stagnation.

I throw crumbs of action,
to convince myself that the universe doesn't want to help me
compared to everything I am doing
to my great efforts, to how incredibly brave I have been...
calm down, self-deceptions don't last long,
I mean, they can last a lifetime,
but the snake will keep appearing, and it will keep biting.

Where is the wild? Where is my wild?
I ask the snake, who doesn't want to look me in the eye.
it doesn't want to give me the pleasure of making me feel special
when I am avoiding life.
it bites and bites again, hoping I remember my essence.

The wild is you, I want it to tell me,
the wild is your nature, your dreams, your laughter.
Tell me something, anything.

But the snake just bites, like a dog that bites to play.